Weddings announcing to you for the first time.....

Duh duh duhduh!!!!!! That was my impression of trumpets....in case you didn't know. Wow I'm weird!!! Anyway did anyone besides menwatch the ROYAL WEDDING of Prince William and Kathrine something?!?!?!! I'm so sorry but I forgot her last name:( I'm horrible I know......*walks away sadly* *then comes running back at you screaming* Hahahaha anyway it was pretty cool except I had to wake up at 3:00 IN THE MORNING!!!!! To find out that ohhh 2 hours of it is people walking into the chapel and sitting. So I reset my alarm for 5 AM mind you!!!! And go back to sleep so I wake up to my alarm going WAHWAHWAHWAH!!!!!!! So I get up turn the tv on and so I watch it and it was actually really cool!!! But it kinda creeped me out cause they had this all boy choir and the little boys sounded like angels and little woman all mixed together and it was weird but I guess kinda cool in a way.0_o

So the thing that i thought was awesome was that once they got married they were Duke and Duchess of Cambridge!!! I was like WOW!!!!! NO WAY!!!! I dunno I just thought I was cool!!!!*purses lips and looks around weirdly* but the weird thing about that is that they were given those names by the queen like that was a gift from the queen!!!!! Isn't that weird?!?!?!?!!? But yeah so just wanted to tell you guys bout that!! So peace love bacon,

Jessy

!?!?!?

*says in Italian accent* That's crazy so crazy it justa mighta work!!!!!*lifts on eyebrow and smiles creepily*

Who is the Culprit?

Imagine with me! *sets stage*

We are in Spanish I. Mrs. Martin is saying something about pronouns and la madre, but you can't pay attention because all you know is that someone just released a nuclear fart bomb. Your eyes sting. You've never smelt anything like this; you compair to you father's toots. THIS IS WAY WORSE! Thoughts cross your mind like, "Am I the only one who is smelling this? I hope none of the boys think it was me" and "When is it going to end!?"

Just as a break in the "fog" comes through, another wave of HORRID stench comes through. You hold you breathe and hope for the best. It happens 2 more times, and just as soon as you feel that you are going to erupt into laughter from the irony of it all going in SPANISH CLASS, Mrs. Jane releases you from class.

You then proceed to help put away the Spanish chairs and tables. Phillip Crisp is standing there with a broom and looks up innocently and asks," Is it just me or does it smell like really bad fart in here?" You die laughing and Ellen, Shiphrah, and Phillip all join in.

In the hallway you continue the fart convo with the eldest girl of the Dooley clan, and the tallest daughter of the Oakes group. You discuss the PAIN that you felt from lack of breath, how the person MUST have had beans or cabbage , and who you think it is. You erupt into laughter for Shiphrah knows who it is. Your insides hurt from the thought of it all.

Your Dad comes to pick you up and you relay the story to him. He guesses what you are going to say before the words come out of your mouth. "Some one passed gas, huh?" are his exact words. He wheezes and swerves the car because he is laughing. He tells you, that you should have randomly bursted into laughed and said with a Spanish accent," Man, those burritos. They really get to 'ya."

You get home and the 1st thing that crosses your mind is sharing your rib ache with you fellow bloggers. And here is where the story ends.

So who was the culprit that bombed it's fellow classmates? Only a few will know, and it will NOT be you. Adios amigos.

Keeping a safe distance from anything gaseous,

Carlos

Sickiness!

Okay so last night when we were driving home...*cringes* we ran over an Albino O'Possum. :( It was so sad. Dad tried to avoid it, but ran right over it. I was super depressed after that. I've never been in the car when we've ran over an animal bigger than a butterfly. It was sad. i won't describe the awful noise to you. Because it was...awful.

2+2=CHICKEN! Have you guys ever seen Brian Regan? So funny, but oh so stupid. I've technically only seen it 3 times, or possibly twice, but I know like ALL the words and acts and stuff. Good luck with you hopes and dreams. *panics* Grab my hand!!! Hahah...good times, good times.

I just finished my World Lit. paper that was due last week. I'm behind in my school work and it pretty much stinks because I can't ever do anything. Whoa, my brain must still think I'm writing my paper, 'cause as I was writing that contraction can't, I backspaces and put can not. HAHAHA...weird! But I fixed it so now I don't sounds like a weirdo.

Can't wait 'till school is out! Camp this year is going to be awesome, except for Grace Camp is going to be a little less awesome because Ashley, Naomi, and Iain are all going to Camp Barnabas the same week AS GRACE CAMP. *Stairs at them evilly* HOW COULD YOU GUYS?!?! *weeps over dramatically* Anyways, they are weirdo's, but all the rest of us COOL peeps are going to Grace. Lol.

High school is so boring sometimes. It will be a sad thing to graduate. Seriously, I don't want to think about UCA when kids Jessyca's age are going to "rule" the school. That will be a freaky day. Lets think...that will be: Jessyca, Stewart, David, Phillip, Ezra, *already getting chills*, Claudia, Hannah Carroll, and I think Anna Rentfro?? That's just some of the people I can think of off the top of my head. Anna what year do you graduate? Lol, O_O Wow, that is way freakier written out then just saying.

Well got to go study for my tests in the morning! Be safe...and don't slaps any pigs. O_O

Carlton

*dies laughing and pees on floor*

See this? *looks at it* Wow....this is creepy beyond all reason. I'm seriously sitting at this computer in awe of how freaky this bunny is. The kid seems to agree with me. I wouldn't want to be within 40 ft. of this dude, my less sitting on his lap. *shakes head* What parents put their children through.....would you like to see more?





Well, this little girl seems to be enjoying herself, but that bunny behind her looks like he is possessed. That thing is not even cute. What is going on here? It gets worse.





Need I say anything? No seriously, just stare at this for a while and ask yourself what exactly the designer was thinking when they created this. It's really disturbing. You know what else is disturbing? This looks like it's at the Watson's house......*appalled gasp* Carlee, is that you?






Look at this one! I'd be crying too! His eyes looks like gigantic chasms of death! And look at it's smile.....*stares at it and laughs hysterically*







I'm really wishing I was there, cause I would've smashed this things head in with a rock. It looks like paper mache! And that kid looks like he's saying faintly, "Grandma....."







Baby sees...............baby cries. That's the story of the Easter Bunny's life.










Now! Here is the worst one of all! Poor baby is probably filling his little diaper.


Yep, that's all I have! I just thought I would share the cruelty/hilarity of this whole thing. *sighs*

*Gasp* Gasp...

Okay so I am TOTALLY offended that Becca got a vote for Most Ninja. -_- I think Becca voted for herself, which is totally lardish of her. She was to lazy to go out and campaine for herself like I do. Lol, another thing. How in the world does everyone BUT me have a vote on the Commmon Sense Poll? Do I seriously not have ANY common sense? I mean what in the world is up with that? *shrieks* What is the world comming too? Oh, I get it, it's because I'm African American isn't it? You all are SO racists I don't know where to begin. Or maybe it's because I'm blonde. Well let me tell you something punk, Momma don't like games. I'm coming for 'ya.

Carl

P.S. There words speller thing is not working so I'm not sure if I spelled anything right!!! HAHA...

Dear Dillusional Jessy

(In response to your kind words)

I would like to point out that I'm ahead on the common sense poll, so we will see about that (although I'm mortified that Becca somehow managed a vote...she probably voted for herself).

As for me? I'm not burning. I'm completely cool over here, because I know that you are just lashing out in anger (because you know the truth and it hurts) and you will be fine when you come face to face with reality. Could be a while by the looks of it, but I have hope that you will eek out a meager existence by relying on the sun to wake you up in the morning. Whatever fantasies you have about being smarter than me in the meantime, isn't my problem. I know the truth and pray that one day you will too. I know a good counselor, call me. ;)

This is for Ashley!!!

Well hello people! I thought I'd let you guys see what I had to say to Ashley,after the post she put!! Nononono not the one about keylime stuff!(which by the way pretty much all keylime flavored stuff is nasty!! The yogurt is pretty good! The pie ehhh not that good!! The bracket was cute though!!!)

Anyway!!!!! This is for ashley!!!!*smiles evilly*

Ashley!!!!! WHAT THE CRUD IS WRONG WITH YOU!!!!!! YOU SHOULD BE HONORED TO BE TIED WITH ME ON THE POLL!!!!! The only reason you think, wait wait wait
Let's emphasize MAJORLY on the think part so!!! The only reason you THINK I'm stupid is because every time I'm around you I have to come down to YOUR level!!!! You got that?!?!?!!

Well here let me put it in your language. Me not really stupid. I just acting!!! And acting means pretending!!! Kinda!!!! ;)

So therefore since I feel bad like normal that youre well....not normal. I told everyone to vote for you!!! So therefore( haha can't you tell I love that word!!!) that's the ONLY reason you're winning right now!!!

Wait *sniffs* do you smell something burning?!!? haha oh wait that's just you!!!!!!!

*does a really deep voice* MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Love,bacon and well haha me completely burning ash,

Jessy

In Response to Ashley's Key Lime Post

Okay so I had to do a post to un-brain wash all the people that say they like Key Lime. Would you rather have Key Lime, or *says mesmerised* THESE??

Yeah, that tingly feeling you get in your mouth. That's called Love of Cupcakes. Don't deny it.

LOOK AT ALL THE VARIETY!






Look! It's everyone's favorite Italian Dude!

My own creation...very recently! Don't fight the feeling of wanting to devour it whole.

So what looks better now? Still that nasty green Die-Die? Or these beautiful master pieces??

Fairyness and Key Lime

I didn't say I WISH I was the blog fairy. I AM the blog fairy. Ex-skus-em-wah!

I just thought I would talk about how much I love key time flavored stuff. For real. Its so tangy and it makes a crease in my forehead. Don't you love when that happens? Just having a little crease in your forehead is great. You can reach up, touch your forehead and say, "Oh wonderful! the grand canyon is in my forehead!" And it makes you salivate Niagra Falls.

Take for example the wonder of key lime pie, in all its radiant magnificence. It's amazing! The crumbly crust and the tower-of-babel-like dollop of cool whip. The cold thickness of the pie is so refreshing and you feel it travel through your esophagus. It gets stuck in your teeth, but WHO CARES! You smile anyways because you cannot resist the urge to show everyone just how happy key lime has made you. People stare and you wave at them.

You catch some of the lime-scented air wafts in your hands and blow it people for good luck and happy lime wishes. Key Lime is a joy worth experiencing and sharing with a friend. So show someone how much you love them today and get them a key lime pie, cupcake, or maybe even a key-lime charm bracelet. Start making friends you never thought you had.

Maybe even top their treat of with...I don't know...Nutella? Don't even get me started on the illuminating glory of that stuff. Its toast's favorite spread. The crowning glory of any breakfast table. 

And remember, I never steer you wrong. *wink* 

Blog Fairy and Thoughts

Hahah...Ashley, Ashley, Ashley. We all know how you wish you were a fairy, but seriously, a Blog Fairy? *dies laughing* I told every one on the internet that you wish you were a Fairy! Wow, anyways, I was kidding.

Hey cool idea, we should get t-shirts made with our names on them and that have the picture of Weep Your Tears Into the Channel, and then the www. thing with out website adress on it. Some time in the future maybe! :)

I have SO much school work this week that I don't know if I will be on here much.

I love Cupcake frosting. AND I love Cupcakes. At this place in Antioch, called Sparkle, they had Key Lime Cupcake. *gags* WHY do they have to ruin that poor Cupcakes hopes and dreams by making it ugly. *wipes tears from eyes*

Only like 3 more weeks 'till school it out! I am SUPER excited and nervous at the SAME TIME. I will miss all my buddies A TON. That's why I'm nervous, 'cause I won't get to see all my friends twice a week. Poop. But I am excited 'cause that means NO school work, and more time to tan.

Okay what is up with this weather lately? Rain, rain rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, BORING!

*does Barbie hand wave and blows kisses* Good bye my voters. *starts crying* I just can't believe that I got this award I mean this is just...*starts blubbering so you can't understand what she is saying* UYOBgfbsodubgoUSBgbBOGUBgjbodjbsdjgobdjbgoSUDBGOUSBDEGOUSBDGUSBDGO.

Love, Bacon, and Cupcakes! STL,

Carl

I'm the blog fairy

Yes, the blog fairy finally came. This place needed to be a little picked up. Everything was all MUMBO JUMBO on the sides which is *says really sassy-y* like my MAJOR PET PEEVE! You know what imma saying? For real, on my blog I switch the gadgets around all the time, because it NEVER EVER looks straight and beautiful enough. Stuff always looks messy. So, Wones, in the future....put polls, with polls...not randomly across the gadget bar. AND NAME YOUR GADGETS on the control page. It will make thing 20 gazillion times easier when trying to rearrange and correct. OKAY?

Okay!

*dusts off hands*

You've got to be kidding....

*cough* I am appalled. Seriously? J is tied with me for the common sense poll. ?!?!?!

If that is as much common sense I am thought to have, then I should just bury my head in the sand like an ostrich to prove a point!

Me tied with Jessyca? I mean, I would understand if Ronald Reagen were up there or something...But Jessy?

*snort*

FINE! Have if your way!

*dingdingding*WE HAVE A WIIINNNEEERRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Says in announcer voice* Ladys and gentlemen we have a winner!!!!!! Hence the title!!!!
  
                      CONGRATULATIONS TO ANNA RENTFRO!!!!!!!
She has officially won the challange!!!! Anna we will get the $5 to you sometime this week! Most likely!

    Sorry to the people who guessed and got it wrong!!!! But thanks for guessing!!!

LOVE YALL!!!!

                           The Wones

Feeties...

Okay y'all. The other night Ash and Beccs stayed at my house and we took a random picture of all our feet. What we want you guys to do is guess who's feet is whose (from left to right). The 1st person to get it right (that does not include Jessy, Ash, Becca, or me since we know the answer.), will receive 5$!! :) No lie, I will seriously give the person 5 bucks. Okay here are the rules:

*talk show host voice*

1. You must follow ALL the following rules. (I have spies everywhere so don't think I won't know if you break one).

2. You must NOT under any circumstances ask Becca, Ashley, Jessyca, or me if you can look at our feet. You must simply and secretly compare them. BUT you have to be as secret as possible.

3. You are not allowed to compare notes with anyone. Meaning, you are not allowed to turn to your BFF and be like , "Hey so which foot is Jessyca's?" And then they tell you what they have found out so far. THAT IS NOT LEGAL! At all.

4. You are not allowed to take pictures of our feet.

5. You are not allowed to rub seasonings on our feet. *sicks out* Hopefully none of you will have the random urge to rub Basil on Ashley's feet.

6. You are not allowed to ask our relatives about this contest, since they know what our feet look like.

7. You are not allowed to lick Becca's feet, unless your house is on fire.

8. You are not allowed to ask our shoe size, if we have duck feet, or if we have any mutilated pinkie toes.

9. You are not allowed to ask us to give you hints!!!

10. You are not allowed to ask us any questions about the contest at all. Only we are allowed to ask you. Got it?

11. You must have funn at all times. Oh, and smile. So there are the rules and here comes the picture. On your mark. Get set. Go! -Carkeys

Wind Blown

Holy cruddles! I'm at work right now, and Mrs. Kathy said, "I need you to run this over to the *****(I can't say which office)*****. Take my umbrella with you though cause it's raining." Now, this Office is all the way across campus, but I thought, "It's okay. At least I'll have an umbrella so I won't get drenched." So, I headed out, totally happy to have an umbrella over my head. It was going amazing, till I rounded the corner and started cruising down the stairs. The wind swooshed under Mrs. Kathy's umbrella and completely turned it inside-out. All of the little pole things that hold it up were broken and totally displaced. I frantically tried to fix it, but to no avail. My eyes burned as tears rushed to my eyes. I felt SO bad. I had just totally demolished Mrs. Kathy's umbrella. So, ended up that I DID in fact get drenched. I headed back to my office, regretting to show Mrs. Kathy what I did....but to my surprise, as soon as I showed her, she broke out in a harty laugh. She grabbed it from me and ran to show all the rest of the ladies. I followed close behind her. Soon there was a chorus of laughter coming from the HR office. They couldn't get over how mutilated it looked. LOL. Anyways, I'm glad that Mrs. Kathy wasn't upset and that it made the office laugh. I'm sure they won't let me live it down though. They are already saying stuff like, "Don't let Becca ever use your umbrella. She'll ruin it." *shakes head* They LOVE picking on me. That, and trying to get me to eat their food. They all say I'm too skinny :P Well, now I look like a crazy woman. My hair is matted from the rain and my makeup is a little smeared. *sigh* What a wind blown day.

War Zone...

Narrator. Carlee. Graycen.

*Talks with Mafia Accent* Okay, so here's how it goes. Picture this: We're in our basement with Graycen (a 4 year old). We have these huge bouncy balls and are playing with the. *Peeps reading this get scared knowing how Carlee can be when she has a huge ball that is SUPER bouncy* Graycen wants to attack Jessyca, so he recruits me. Smart kid; real bright. So we hit her, but something goes wrong! As Carlee's ball is being released from her grip it goes toward Jessyca's head NOT her torso. As it bounces off her large cranium, the gravitational pull shoots it back toward the ball lobber. It then smacks Carlee in the face, shooting toward the ceiling. Then before either could say anything, Carlee's Ninja Apprentice, burst out laughing saying, "Oh your Momma's not 'gonna like that!" *Ducks from flying balls* They are now trying to hit me. It is like a war zone. Luckily, I am a Ninja, so I can survive out here in this harsh environment.

I just deflected one of the balls that Graycen threw and it hit him in the face! O_O *Dies laughing* It is SO *bugs eyes* FUNNY! Anyways, Jessyca told him to use his Wizard powers to turn me into a zit. -_- So now I am a zit. Adios Ninja Fans!

Main Ninja Queen

Cha-Cha-Cha-Chia

*cracks up* Okay, so do you remember those things? The Chia Pets? They were like pots that were shaped like animals, or something cool like that, and you would grow some lousy grass stuff in them. Lol, like everyone had them. OH OH, or those water color thing, it was like a rainbow. You could put like 5 different colors on it and then paint with it and it would make a line of colors? Lol, I randomly started thinking about all the stupid phases of toys and gadgets people go through. Like Wheelies. Those things are SO stupid. Anyways, I can't really think of anyother "trends" like these except for those thick rubber braclet things, and silly bands. Which I did own both of. *looks at floor in bashful, ashamed way* YOU NOOBS! Leave coments about some kind of thing that you remember from your childhood. OUBGUBDEOGUbOUBGOUSBDGUOSBGUOOUGBSODUBGO. Carlee

Boredomeeeeeeeeeee........:(

*says in mopey lonely bored voice*hiiii peopleeee. I was bored cause I'm babysitting and they went to bed soooooo, I'm sitting here watching Disney oceans on Netflix. And no offense but it's REALLY boring. It's like *changes to fake excited voice* oh look! The whale flopped oh hooooo!!!!! * does fake giggly girlish laugh* really that's supposed to be exciting? Then WOW you people did not do your job very well! Just sayin!! Well sorry for wasting yalls time by telling you how bored I am!!!!! So for you that aren't bored *says in sarcastic jealous voice* GOOD FOR YOU!!! Now if you'll excuse me I'm gonna listen and watch some otters go EEEEEEEE and AAAAA-aaaaaa so yeah!!! Peace love and BACON. See y'all.


P.S. There's an air freshener and it goes off every like 10 or 15 minutes and it's scares the POOP out a me every time!!! And it's freaking annoying!!!!!

Signed,
Bored,freaked out,annoyed,havin to pee *takes deep breath* Jessy

Lemon-a-aaadee a cool refreshing drink!!!

Just wanted to say "hey people's" and tell y'all that countrytime lemonade IS.THE.BEST!!!!! so go get some and drink it all in five stinkin seconds!!!!!! Well peace love and BACON!!!!! See y'all peeps Sunday well most of y'all!!!!!!;P

The Mower...

The stupid mower won't start so I'm sitting in the freezing basement in the tanning outfit waiting for it to charge!! *looks at mower grimly* Letting the world know. Carlee

The Shower....

Okay, so funny story that just happened. I was in the shower....shaving my legs actually*voice gets louder and crowd leans forward in anticipation* ...when all of a sudden the lights went out. It was super dark. Like it took a little while for my eyes to adjust to the darkness. *flops hands in the air* I started screaming and then I had to unlock the door and have Mom bring me and lamp, 'cause there is no way I would go around with one leg shaved and another not. *looks at you like you are crazy for thinking she would* Anyways just thought I would share that little tid-bit with you. Enjoy the wind and sunshine! Cheeseballs, Cars

Quiz...

Okay so this is the link to a quiz about me. I am actually the one who found the website that everyone is using to make quizzes on. I gave it to Ash and then Becca did it and it seemed like everyone got one. O_O I guess I'm a lot late on posting mine. Lol. Anyways here it is! Enjoy and leave comments about the ones that you got wrong. :P STL, Carlton http://www.quizyourfriends.com/take-quiz.php?id=1104061133598178&a=1&

Camping Pics...

This is me almost falling off the log. *Cracks up at face*

These are the rocks we were jumping on. You can see the head of one of the little boys. There were like hundreds of these rocks to jump on. It was awesome!!

This tree was super tall, plus I was leaning to it over a cliff thing on the rocks. I was doing the splits trying to get this pic....NO LIE! *nods head*

In case you can't tell, we are ALL crossing our eyes in a freaky way. Dad is the only one who can't do it. We randomly fuigured that out.

Jessyca was jumping off this log, but she would never do it the way I wanted. You see I wanted to get her with one leg straight out as if kicking something, but I guess her body doesn't bend that way.

I was down squished inbetween some of the rocks and I was trying to get a picture of the tree at the left, because it grew into the rocks. But Dad was like get a picture of us. *apologizes for you having to see his hairy stomach*

This is me trying NOT to slip as I get my fat lard butt up on the top of the log.

In this pic Jessyca almost fell into the water. *cracks up* Just look at her facial expression!!

This is Sara Bell (our dog). We played fetch with her ALL the time because she loves swiming. It's weird, but sadly we had to stop because there was glass all over the place that we didn't see and she cut her paw and sliced a big chunk of skin off and has been limping. :(

Isn't she addorable!?!??! *kisses poochey on forhead* She looks like a wild animal.

Camping....

Hello everybody! Okay so we got back from camping yesterday (Monday) and it was totally awesome and funn! Besides barely making it out of Defeated Creek before the HUMONGO storm hit, besides getting random scratches and bruises, and besides my butt hurting...it was super fun. These little kids almost gave me a heart attack. *throws hands over heart* They were all jumping on these really high rocks (I was too which probably didn't help the situation) and they were like building "bridges" across them with like little twigs. Let me tell you right now if they would have fallen they definitely would have broken something. Lol, and I would be like jumping and doing cool Par core stuff and saying, "I'm a Ninja," and they would try to out do me. O_O It was freaky! Lol, then we had to chase them across this field of wood/log/twig things to get them to NOT climb into a 2 foot tall "cave". *sighs from exhaustion of telling about how stressed she got* Then I started bleeding and got scratches all over me. *starts whining like a little baby* It was not my happiest moment, okay? Plus I got super sunburn *points to face in agony* I know I'll be tan afterwards, but it really wasn't fun. Dude, my nose was/is like....an unnatural shade of purple. But!!! Me and Jessyca did get some awesome pictures which I am going to upload in another post okay??? We took pictures on this log (my idea) of use in the Karate Kid stance. *shows you the move* Where he is like doing the one leg thing....'ya know??? *looks at you dumbly with sunburn face* My face feels like I got a Botox. :( Hey we watched the movie You Again....I HIGHLY recommend it if you want to crack up alot. We also watched House and it was SOOO not scary at all. I thought I was going to have a full dipey *pats butt* when the movie was over, but it was totally not freaky. Hope you all enjoyed your week! STL, Carkikooooooo

Tid-bit that brightened my dull day

Three words. Four syllables. Simple meaning....."Poopsy is dumb." Who is Poopsy? I shall tell you. Poopsy is my iguana that I have a hate grudge against. (hence the name) I have been tempted numerous times to release him into the cold wild, but I didn't have the heart to find him frozen somewhere, so I contained myself. He's a rude little lard butt who likes to freak out for no apparent reason. Compared to my other iguana who I loved dearly, Poopsy is jank. Oscar (a three foot long sweetheart) would chill with me and jump out of his cage onto my shoulder because he loved me. Poopsy would rather hang by his tail for a few hours than to have me touch him. He doesn't understand how loving I am. *snickers at the absurdity*

But anyways, why do I say that Poopsy is dumb? Well, I'll tell you ALL about it. I find joy in watching him do funny things. Here are some of the little instances that have almost made me pee.

Just today, I came home to him with his eye pushed really hard up against the glass. The eye was shut but pushed SUPER hard against the glass so when he backed up, there was a little circle of condensation.

Then the other night, he was climbing up on his screen. (top of his cage) I kept telling him he was gonna get stuck, but he wouldn't listen. I said, "If you get stuck and can't get down, I'm gonna have to help you, and if I do that, you might freak out and rip your toe off." Well, sure enough the little man was dangling upside down and couldn't figure out how to get down. He started swinging and somehow dislodged his toe nail.

A quirk my iguana has is this: ZERO SENSORY NERVES. When there's a huge stick stuck to his face, he acts like he doesn't even notice. For instance, the other day there was literally a piece of cedar stuck to his face that was like an inch long and really thick. I don't know how that heavy thing managed to stick so well on his face. But he just went about his day like he didn't realize a whole log was weighing his head down. Weird.

Anyways, for anyone who would like to experience my iguana's weirdness and laugh at his disturbing stunts...be my guest. Take him from me. I will try not to cry hysterically. He would need someone who is patient though because he needs to be trained not to hate people. *laughs at this* What a little wreck. He's cute though. *smiles and talks baby talk*

OH. M. DUH-BUH-U.

* freaks out and runs into room at 100 MPH in a excited-puppy-dog way* Guess what????!!!! Some random guy heard me singing the other day in Wal-mart and said he liked my voice. Then he offered me a 4 year contract with his record company. I'm freaking out. I'm supposed to go in 2 weeks and start my first recording. I guess the dude has worked with alot of big stars like Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez. I can't believe this is happening! I've put some more stuff about him and what I'm going to be singing down below....so scroll down to see. :) Scroll down... Farther down... even farther.....into the gates of hell....kidding. I was just saying that because you know hell is like fire and the middle of the earth is like really hot and the center of the earth is really far down and stuff. *gives and awkward look* I'm just going to shut up now. APRIL FOOLS!!!!! If you believed that this was real then something is wrong with you. I know I'm a horrible person. My dad came in my room this morning an told me that we weren't going camping because Mom had to do some work. I was like all bummed and freaking out. And then he was like *does an impression of Dad* "APRIL FOOLS." -_- Let's just say I wasn't a happy camper.....punn intended! Anyways, remember not to let yourself get tricked by too many people. If you think something sounds weird, then it's probly 'cause your about to get tricked. Love you guys! Leave comments if you seriously believed me. :) Carlton